There is nothing that even Shakespeare would enjoy more than a good
burlesque of Hamlet.
viii--For Narcissus
(A)
(To be written in front of the orchestral score.)
May he be damned for evermore
Who tampers with Narcissus' score;
May he by poisonous snakes be bitten
Who writes more parts than what we've written.
We tried to make our music clear
For those who sing and those who hear,
Not lost and muddled up and drowned
In over-done orchestral sound;
So kindly leave the work alone
Or do it as we want it done.
(B)
Part II
Symphony
(During which the audience is requested to think as follows:)
An aged lady taken ill
Desires to reconstruct her will;
I see the servants hurrying for
The family solicitor;
Post-haste he comes and with him brings
The usual necessary things.
With common form and driving quill
He draws the first part of the will,
The more sonorous solemn sounds
Denote a hundred thousand pounds,
This trifle is the main bequest,
Old friends and servants take the rest.
'Tis done! I see her sign her name,
I see the attestors do the same.
Who is the happy legatee?
In the next number you will see.
ix--A Translation
(Attempted in consequence of a challenge.)
"'Mrs. Harris,' I says to her, 'dont name the charge, for if I could
afford to lay all my feller creeturs out for nothink I would gladly
do it; sich is the love I bear 'em.
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