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Adams, Samuel Hopkins, 1871-1958

"Average Jones"


Emolument for one month's work generous.
Man without family insisted upon.
Apply after 8:30 P. M. in proper person.
Smith, 74 Bellair Street."
Slowly whirling in his chair, Average Jones held out a hand,
received the clipping, read it through with attention, laid it on
the desk, and yawned.
"Is that all?" said the indignant Bertram. "Do you notice that
'unattached' in the opening sentence? And the specification that
the applicant must be without family? Doesn't that inspire any
notion above a yawn in your palsied processes of mind?"
"It does; several notions. I yawned," explained Average Jones
with dignity, "because I perceive with pain that I shall have to
go to work. What do you make of the thing, yourself?"
"Well, this man Smith--"
"What man Smith?"
"Smith, of 74 Bellair Street, who signs the ad."
Average Jones laughed, "There isn't any Smith," he said.
"What do you know about it?" demanded Bertram, sitting up.
"Only what the advertisement tells me. It was written by a
foreigner; that's too obvious for argument.


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